Do you think parents are to blame for their grown children's values?

My boyfriend of 14 years left me 3 months ago, we have 2 kids. He moved in with his mother, he is 41. He just said he was not into me anymore and the family life is not for him. The thing is his mother would always say that he was not capable of much, maybe just going to work and dating. She has no family values, never has encouraged him to go back to his family. She tells him go out have fun, have some drinks, date. She says he has no backbone and he has the maturity of a 9th grader.She left him when he was 13 with his dad so she could date.She likes having him live with her. She makes him pay no rent. He said he did that for years and doesn't want to do that anymore. He pays child support. The other day she said to my son, oh look how handsome and tan your dad is from going to the beach, the girls just love him. Do you think parents instill values or or do you think as adults we make our own decisions about that. I say the apple does not fall far from the tree.